Thursday, September 25, 2003
today was mum's birthday.. yah... was great.. bought her two slices of cheese cakes and icecream.. hopefully she likes it manz... haiz.. been so sianz the past few days.. got nothing to do.. alvin is forever so busy with his life... i wonder if i ever exist in his life anymore... i dunno.. i feel sad.. i know something is going to happen... just this feeling.. i am trying my best.. i dun wanna let it go.. but if God wants me to.. i guess i really have no choice.. but i really dun want.. i dunnno wat to do... to him.. he is not affected by it.. i dunno.. maybe he is not so sensitive as me.. i dunno.. or maybe he really can't be bothered.. or maybe he is bored of the relationship... he really dun seem to be making an effort... i really trying hard.. not to cry... not to give up... i feel hopeless..
posted @ 9/25/2003 10:19:00 PM
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Saturday, September 13, 2003
Another sad day has passed.. yeah.. all alone.. lookin back, i wonder how i survived.. the only thing i did was wait and cry... and everybody went sentosa.. had to go church all alone.. no choice, promised nigel to teach him paper cranes.. promised ant that i will lend my hp to nigel.. so she can msg him.. anywae.. i know about the sentosa last min.. and i hate last min... and as usual.. everybody comes up to me and say.. why u didn't know? F*** it. THe reason is cause the whole thinks tat my sister will tell me everything.. but no.. all she does is keep it to herself.. and when the day comes, she innocently ask me.. 'why u dunno.. it tot u know.. everybody knows..' WHATEVER MANZ.. do i also look like i give a damn.. i am already pissed and troubled with him already.. i dun need someone to make it worse manz.. and because of this.. my whole day sucked.. and u know why..as usual.. we 'quarrelled' again.. i really dunno what's wrong with us nowadays... argh... getting pissed off with each other isn't going to work out.. but he is forever busy to try to solve the prob.. and as usual, i always have to swallow my pride.. and take the initiative to msg him.. as if it was my fault when it was actually his fault.. why has it always gotta be liddat.. and he act like i am the one who pisses him off.. WTH.. seriously.. i am so tired.. i really feel like giving up.. maybe it is the best for both of us.. but i know i will regret.. but what can i do.. just pray and hope it will be solved.. right now.. waiting for him if he is even going to msg when he is going to be free.. argh..
A sad thing about life is that when
you meet someone who means a lot to you,
only to find out in the end that it was
never bound to be and you just have to let go...
posted @ 9/13/2003 08:15:00 PM
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Monday, September 08, 2003
YEah.. home for a while.. just came back from sch... yesterday booked out of camp so i can have a good slp at home manz.. hahax.. for once, i feel like heaven at home.. this camp totally sucks.. it is so screwed... the cadets pisses me off.. and of all things we got to stay at blk 425.. the so called huanted blk.. makes my hair stand... always so afraid.. but well... at least i had a great slp yesterday night.. though i can't wake up this morn... tonight i think i have to go back and happily do my century duty.. argh.. walking in the dark corridors of the cadets... hope i dun get freak out.. or else.. my poor partner will be confirmed be squash by my tight hug... well... i am going off.. slp.. tired.. then back to camp... pity me..
posted @ 9/08/2003 01:15:00 PM
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